I can't remember when was the last time I felt hurt, I mean my heart. Maybe because that time when I was younger I found out that my crush had someone in his heart already. Yes. I felt hurt for that stupid crush. And that was a long time ago.
It's totally different today, I'm not a baby or a kid anymore. I'm growing up, as a teen. And crushes are not a big deal for me anymore.
I felt hurt for someone who I really love, not just an ordinary crush anymore. Someone who is really special to me. Someone I fell for.
Even tough I'm a little sad of what happened, I know this will pass away since we have talked clearly about our situation.
We are mutually bound. We love each other but we can't be together. He said it is not the right time for both of us.
This is what he said, " Remember what I'll say. Study, Meet people, enjoy your life and if you can live your life as if I'm not part of it. I don't want to be a hindrance to your life."
I cried, of course, for a while. But now I think it is healing.
Thanks for my mother's guidance. Without her, maybe I'll feel more hurt than ever.
'Till next time,
Erica
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Great ... Just Great
I'm an advocate of using correct grammar and proper spelling. I think it improves communication. So when I get something like this in my email, well, it just doesn't help me at all ...
Cna yuo raed tihs?
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
No matter ... I'm still in favor of proper English, even without the support of Cambridge University.
Cna yuo raed tihs?
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
No matter ... I'm still in favor of proper English, even without the support of Cambridge University.
Stay Safe
Here are some statistics:
1. Riding in automobiles is responsible for 20% of all fatal accidents.
2. Seventeen percent of all accidents occur in the home.
3. Fourteen percent of all accidents happen to pedestrians.
4. Sixteen percent of all accidents involve air, rail, or water forms of transportation.
5. Of the remaining 33%, 32% die in hospitals.
BUT, you will be pleased to learn that only .001% of all deaths occur in worship services at church, and these are usually related to previous conditions. Therefore, logic tells us that the safest place for us to be at any given point in time is at church.
And, Bible study is safe, too. The percentage of deaths during Bible study is even less.
So, for SAFETY'S sake, attend church, and read your Bible; IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE.
1. Riding in automobiles is responsible for 20% of all fatal accidents.
2. Seventeen percent of all accidents occur in the home.
3. Fourteen percent of all accidents happen to pedestrians.
4. Sixteen percent of all accidents involve air, rail, or water forms of transportation.
5. Of the remaining 33%, 32% die in hospitals.
BUT, you will be pleased to learn that only .001% of all deaths occur in worship services at church, and these are usually related to previous conditions. Therefore, logic tells us that the safest place for us to be at any given point in time is at church.
And, Bible study is safe, too. The percentage of deaths during Bible study is even less.
So, for SAFETY'S sake, attend church, and read your Bible; IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Colored People
What is it with colors? Have you ever noticed that they have a variety of meanings?
If you're angry, you're seeing red. If you're sad, you're blue. A person can be green with envy, and a coward is yellow. If you're healthy, you're in the pink. A "blah" day would be a gray day. And, of course, if you're really in a bad mood, it could be a black mood.
Then we can shuffle the deck. If you work for a company that isn't making money, it is operating in the red. Of course, if it is making money, you would think it was operating in the green, but it's not -- it's in the black. If it happens to be in the red, you might be seeing red. If you were smart you might feel kind of yellow, of course, realizing that they might give you a pink slip which could make you blue, but the goal for them would be to operate in the black. Yeah, like that's not confusing.
So ... what color are you?
If you're angry, you're seeing red. If you're sad, you're blue. A person can be green with envy, and a coward is yellow. If you're healthy, you're in the pink. A "blah" day would be a gray day. And, of course, if you're really in a bad mood, it could be a black mood.
Then we can shuffle the deck. If you work for a company that isn't making money, it is operating in the red. Of course, if it is making money, you would think it was operating in the green, but it's not -- it's in the black. If it happens to be in the red, you might be seeing red. If you were smart you might feel kind of yellow, of course, realizing that they might give you a pink slip which could make you blue, but the goal for them would be to operate in the black. Yeah, like that's not confusing.
So ... what color are you?
Friday, August 27, 2010
The Problem Thinker
To my readers: I didn't write this. If I knew who did, I'd give them credit. I just thought it was humorous enough to pass on. Be sure to read all the way to the end.
It started out innocently enough.. I began to think at parties now and then -- just to loosen up.
Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.
I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.
That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.
I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't help myself.
I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau, Muir, Confucius and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"
One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."
I came home early that afternoon. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking... ."
"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!"
But, Honey, surely it's not that serious."
"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver.
"You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won't have any money!"
"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently.
She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.
"I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.
I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors.
They didn't open. The library was closed.
To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. Leaning on the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye, "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked.
You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinkers Anonymous poster.
This is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.
I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting..
I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.
Today I took the final step.
I joined the Democratic Party.
It started out innocently enough.. I began to think at parties now and then -- just to loosen up.
Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.
I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.
That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.
I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't help myself.
I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau, Muir, Confucius and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"
One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."
I came home early that afternoon. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking... ."
"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!"
But, Honey, surely it's not that serious."
"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver.
"You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won't have any money!"
"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently.
She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.
"I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.
I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors.
They didn't open. The library was closed.
To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. Leaning on the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye, "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked.
You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinkers Anonymous poster.
This is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.
I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting..
I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.
Today I took the final step.
I joined the Democratic Party.
Humor for Lexophiles
A friend sent this to me and it was worth it to pass it on to you. If you don't laugh, at least you'll have new insight into my character.
1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
4. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
5. The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
6. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
7. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
8. The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it!
9. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.
10. The dead batteries were given out, free of charge.
11. A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
12. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is just two-tired.
13. A will is a dead giveaway.
14. A backward poet writes inverse.
15. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
16. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
17. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulting in linoleum blownapart.
18. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
19. A calendar's days are numbered.
20. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
21. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
22. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
23. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
24. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
4. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
5. The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
6. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
7. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
8. The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it!
9. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.
10. The dead batteries were given out, free of charge.
11. A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
12. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is just two-tired.
13. A will is a dead giveaway.
14. A backward poet writes inverse.
15. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
16. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
17. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulting in linoleum blownapart.
18. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
19. A calendar's days are numbered.
20. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
21. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
22. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
23. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
24. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
NSF
This is not original. A friend of mine has a friend in the banking profession sent me this that was sent to him. I thought it was funny enough to pass on.
Dear Sirs,
I recently received a notice on one of my checks that said "insufficient funds." In view of what is going on internationally with banks at the moment, I was wondering if you could advise me. Does that refer to me or to you?
Sincerely,
A depositor
Dear Sirs,
I recently received a notice on one of my checks that said "insufficient funds." In view of what is going on internationally with banks at the moment, I was wondering if you could advise me. Does that refer to me or to you?
Sincerely,
A depositor
Know-It-Some
I've been accused of being an arrogant know-it-all. While I'm not sure actually knowing it all is a bad thing, I'm pretty sure that being an arrogant know-it-all isn't meant as a compliment. Of course, to be fair, I don't know where the accusation comes from. You see, there are a lot of things I don't understand.
I don't understand the correlation of predestination and free will. I affirm both and perhaps a lot more of it seems clear to me than to a lot of others I know, but I can't really put it all together in a nice, neat package.
I don't understand Quantum Physics. Not even a little.
I don't understand the Trinity. Oh, I believe it and I can explain a lot about it, but ... it's God and I'm not.
The other day I was waiting with other pedestrians at a street corner waiting for the light to change. A woman waiting with us became very agitated. A motorist across the way had part of his car in the crosswalk while he waited behind the bus that had stopped in front of him. She started to yell at him. "Don't you know that it's illegal to stop your car in the crosswalk??!! What's wrong with you??!!" And then she crossed ... against the light. I don't understand people like that.
Some of what I don't get isn't nearly as serious. I work in a "weapons-free zone". So why can't I get free weapons?
I bought a bottle of water from a vending machine and followed the instructions, "Get change here." So why am I still the same?
Why are some people lack toast and tolerant?
What exactly is a pullet surprise and why are people happy to get them?
Oh, the list goes on and on. I'd have to say that I'm not much more than a know-it-some. I think the better people get to know me, the more likely they'll think I'm a know-very-little.
I don't understand the correlation of predestination and free will. I affirm both and perhaps a lot more of it seems clear to me than to a lot of others I know, but I can't really put it all together in a nice, neat package.
I don't understand Quantum Physics. Not even a little.
I don't understand the Trinity. Oh, I believe it and I can explain a lot about it, but ... it's God and I'm not.
The other day I was waiting with other pedestrians at a street corner waiting for the light to change. A woman waiting with us became very agitated. A motorist across the way had part of his car in the crosswalk while he waited behind the bus that had stopped in front of him. She started to yell at him. "Don't you know that it's illegal to stop your car in the crosswalk??!! What's wrong with you??!!" And then she crossed ... against the light. I don't understand people like that.
Some of what I don't get isn't nearly as serious. I work in a "weapons-free zone". So why can't I get free weapons?
I bought a bottle of water from a vending machine and followed the instructions, "Get change here." So why am I still the same?
Why are some people lack toast and tolerant?
What exactly is a pullet surprise and why are people happy to get them?
Oh, the list goes on and on. I'd have to say that I'm not much more than a know-it-some. I think the better people get to know me, the more likely they'll think I'm a know-very-little.
Ah, What then?
While I am reading my book, Sophie's World, I read a paragraph that makes my day. It is like the one who gave that gift (Janus), is asking me about the line you are about to read:
"What if you slept? And what if, in your sleep, you dreamed? And what if, in your dream, you went to the heaven and there plucked a strange and beautiful flower? And what if, when you awoke, you had a flower in your hand?
Ah, what then?"
What then?
Something random to share today :)
"What if you slept? And what if, in your sleep, you dreamed? And what if, in your dream, you went to the heaven and there plucked a strange and beautiful flower? And what if, when you awoke, you had a flower in your hand?
Ah, what then?"
What then?
Something random to share today :)
Banned Bunny
Did you know that there are "banned" Bugs Bunny cartoons? That's right. There are, according to sources, twelve cartoons featuring Bugs Bunny that have been removed from circulation by the owners because they contained what was deemed to be racist or offensive content. Imagine that! Bugs Bunny cartoons -- racist and offensive.
Well, tell me "banned Bugs Bunny cartoons" and I go searching. I haven't found them all. They're not available. But I've seen a few. I watch them and think, "Oh, yeah, I can see how that would be offensive ... today." You see, when I watched them as a kid, I didn't see it. It's not that I was so racist as a child that it didn't phase me. It's that I didn't have a single racist thought as a kid so the notion that Bugs Bunny might be insulting certain people groups never occurred to me. And, now that I think about it, I still have to wonder.
A few of them include caricatures of various races like Native American, black, and Eskimo. As in just about every single Bugs Bunny cartoon that I can think of, Bugs is smart while his antagonist is stupid. Whether it's Pete Puma, Elmer Fudd, or any other character who crosses Bugs' path, they are portrayed as dim-witted and Bugs as brilliant. Funny thing. when Pete Puma or Elmer Fudd or a pack of hounds are portrayed as dim-witted, no one is up in arms. The animal rights folks aren't protesting. There isn't a cacaphony of white organizations trying to ban a racist depiction of white folks in the character of Elmer. But change that character to someone of another race and we've got a problem.
A couple of them include caricatures of the Germans and the Japanese. That, of course, is because they were made during World War II. Anytime we go to war, it is likely that we will make fun of the enemy. Spoofs of Sadaam were popular during Desert Storm. The Internet is full of lampoons of Osama Bin Laden. So in World War II, the Germans and the Japanese were stereotyped and made to look stupid. This, of course, is unacceptable. When satirizing someone, you must always treat them with dignity and decorum. You know, like all the comedy outlets do today when ridiculing the President or Christians or ... wait, that's not working, is it?
I'm not saying that there was no racism in those old cartoons. Nor am I condoning them. I'm simply saying that there's something to be said for childhood innocence. As a kid it never occurred to me that those comedic images were actually intended as racist commentaries. I thought they were cartoons. Foolishly, I thought they were fictional, intended to make Bugs look smart and funny and make me laugh. Little did I know that they were the product of a deep and abiding hatred for anything "other". I didn't suspect that Elmer Fudd represented a stupid white American, that Pete Puma was the cartoon's way of telling us how all pumas are idiots, or that Japanese people are idiots because they portrayed one that way. So maybe children miss this stuff.
I suspect, however, that in some cases children are simply more accurate in these things. It seems as if any comment, any innuendo, any wink-wink-nudge-nudge, anything that even hints at the mere possibility of a whiff of racism is perceived as an affront. In a recent news item about how white people are becoming the minority in many places, I heard the commentator mention how Hispanics perceive "illegal alien" as racist. Now, if you examine the term, there is nothing "racist" in the term. Illegal aliens come from any country that is not this country. They are any race, any color, any creed. It is non-discriminatory except for the concept of "illegal". Yet the perception is that the term is racist. Why? And why is it that only white people can be racist? Why is it that no one is complaining on the behalf of Elmer Fudd? He's white and stupid. Why aren't they up in arms over that?
I don't know. I like to think that adults acquire wisdom over the years, and I believe that is generally true. Sometimes, however, the innocence of children will provide a component of wisdom that many seem to have lost. Can't we all just get along?
Well, tell me "banned Bugs Bunny cartoons" and I go searching. I haven't found them all. They're not available. But I've seen a few. I watch them and think, "Oh, yeah, I can see how that would be offensive ... today." You see, when I watched them as a kid, I didn't see it. It's not that I was so racist as a child that it didn't phase me. It's that I didn't have a single racist thought as a kid so the notion that Bugs Bunny might be insulting certain people groups never occurred to me. And, now that I think about it, I still have to wonder.
A few of them include caricatures of various races like Native American, black, and Eskimo. As in just about every single Bugs Bunny cartoon that I can think of, Bugs is smart while his antagonist is stupid. Whether it's Pete Puma, Elmer Fudd, or any other character who crosses Bugs' path, they are portrayed as dim-witted and Bugs as brilliant. Funny thing. when Pete Puma or Elmer Fudd or a pack of hounds are portrayed as dim-witted, no one is up in arms. The animal rights folks aren't protesting. There isn't a cacaphony of white organizations trying to ban a racist depiction of white folks in the character of Elmer. But change that character to someone of another race and we've got a problem.
A couple of them include caricatures of the Germans and the Japanese. That, of course, is because they were made during World War II. Anytime we go to war, it is likely that we will make fun of the enemy. Spoofs of Sadaam were popular during Desert Storm. The Internet is full of lampoons of Osama Bin Laden. So in World War II, the Germans and the Japanese were stereotyped and made to look stupid. This, of course, is unacceptable. When satirizing someone, you must always treat them with dignity and decorum. You know, like all the comedy outlets do today when ridiculing the President or Christians or ... wait, that's not working, is it?
I'm not saying that there was no racism in those old cartoons. Nor am I condoning them. I'm simply saying that there's something to be said for childhood innocence. As a kid it never occurred to me that those comedic images were actually intended as racist commentaries. I thought they were cartoons. Foolishly, I thought they were fictional, intended to make Bugs look smart and funny and make me laugh. Little did I know that they were the product of a deep and abiding hatred for anything "other". I didn't suspect that Elmer Fudd represented a stupid white American, that Pete Puma was the cartoon's way of telling us how all pumas are idiots, or that Japanese people are idiots because they portrayed one that way. So maybe children miss this stuff.
I suspect, however, that in some cases children are simply more accurate in these things. It seems as if any comment, any innuendo, any wink-wink-nudge-nudge, anything that even hints at the mere possibility of a whiff of racism is perceived as an affront. In a recent news item about how white people are becoming the minority in many places, I heard the commentator mention how Hispanics perceive "illegal alien" as racist. Now, if you examine the term, there is nothing "racist" in the term. Illegal aliens come from any country that is not this country. They are any race, any color, any creed. It is non-discriminatory except for the concept of "illegal". Yet the perception is that the term is racist. Why? And why is it that only white people can be racist? Why is it that no one is complaining on the behalf of Elmer Fudd? He's white and stupid. Why aren't they up in arms over that?
I don't know. I like to think that adults acquire wisdom over the years, and I believe that is generally true. Sometimes, however, the innocence of children will provide a component of wisdom that many seem to have lost. Can't we all just get along?
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My heart is in pain
I can't remember when was the last time I felt hurt, I mean my heart. Maybe because that time when I was younger I found out that my crush had someone in his heart already. Yes. I felt hurt for that stupid crush. And that was a long time ago.
It's totally different today, I'm not a baby or a kid anymore. I'm growing up, as a teen. And crushes are not a big deal for me anymore.
I felt hurt for someone who I really love, not just an ordinary crush anymore. Someone who is really special to me. Someone I fell for.
Even tough I'm a little sad of what happened, I know this will pass away since we have talked clearly about our situation.
We are mutually bound. We love each other but we can't be together. He said it is not the right time for both of us.
This is what he said, " Remember what I'll say. Study, Meet people, enjoy your life and if you can live your life as if I'm not part of it. I don't want to be a hindrance to your life."
I cried, of course, for a while. But now I think it is healing.
Thanks for my mother's guidance. Without her, maybe I'll feel more hurt than ever.
'Till next time,
Erica
It's totally different today, I'm not a baby or a kid anymore. I'm growing up, as a teen. And crushes are not a big deal for me anymore.
I felt hurt for someone who I really love, not just an ordinary crush anymore. Someone who is really special to me. Someone I fell for.
Even tough I'm a little sad of what happened, I know this will pass away since we have talked clearly about our situation.
We are mutually bound. We love each other but we can't be together. He said it is not the right time for both of us.
This is what he said, " Remember what I'll say. Study, Meet people, enjoy your life and if you can live your life as if I'm not part of it. I don't want to be a hindrance to your life."
I cried, of course, for a while. But now I think it is healing.
Thanks for my mother's guidance. Without her, maybe I'll feel more hurt than ever.
'Till next time,
Erica
Great ... Just Great
I'm an advocate of using correct grammar and proper spelling. I think it improves communication. So when I get something like this in my email, well, it just doesn't help me at all ...
Cna yuo raed tihs?
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
No matter ... I'm still in favor of proper English, even without the support of Cambridge University.
Cna yuo raed tihs?
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!
No matter ... I'm still in favor of proper English, even without the support of Cambridge University.
Stay Safe
Here are some statistics:
1. Riding in automobiles is responsible for 20% of all fatal accidents.
2. Seventeen percent of all accidents occur in the home.
3. Fourteen percent of all accidents happen to pedestrians.
4. Sixteen percent of all accidents involve air, rail, or water forms of transportation.
5. Of the remaining 33%, 32% die in hospitals.
BUT, you will be pleased to learn that only .001% of all deaths occur in worship services at church, and these are usually related to previous conditions. Therefore, logic tells us that the safest place for us to be at any given point in time is at church.
And, Bible study is safe, too. The percentage of deaths during Bible study is even less.
So, for SAFETY'S sake, attend church, and read your Bible; IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE.
1. Riding in automobiles is responsible for 20% of all fatal accidents.
2. Seventeen percent of all accidents occur in the home.
3. Fourteen percent of all accidents happen to pedestrians.
4. Sixteen percent of all accidents involve air, rail, or water forms of transportation.
5. Of the remaining 33%, 32% die in hospitals.
BUT, you will be pleased to learn that only .001% of all deaths occur in worship services at church, and these are usually related to previous conditions. Therefore, logic tells us that the safest place for us to be at any given point in time is at church.
And, Bible study is safe, too. The percentage of deaths during Bible study is even less.
So, for SAFETY'S sake, attend church, and read your Bible; IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE.
Colored People
What is it with colors? Have you ever noticed that they have a variety of meanings?
If you're angry, you're seeing red. If you're sad, you're blue. A person can be green with envy, and a coward is yellow. If you're healthy, you're in the pink. A "blah" day would be a gray day. And, of course, if you're really in a bad mood, it could be a black mood.
Then we can shuffle the deck. If you work for a company that isn't making money, it is operating in the red. Of course, if it is making money, you would think it was operating in the green, but it's not -- it's in the black. If it happens to be in the red, you might be seeing red. If you were smart you might feel kind of yellow, of course, realizing that they might give you a pink slip which could make you blue, but the goal for them would be to operate in the black. Yeah, like that's not confusing.
So ... what color are you?
If you're angry, you're seeing red. If you're sad, you're blue. A person can be green with envy, and a coward is yellow. If you're healthy, you're in the pink. A "blah" day would be a gray day. And, of course, if you're really in a bad mood, it could be a black mood.
Then we can shuffle the deck. If you work for a company that isn't making money, it is operating in the red. Of course, if it is making money, you would think it was operating in the green, but it's not -- it's in the black. If it happens to be in the red, you might be seeing red. If you were smart you might feel kind of yellow, of course, realizing that they might give you a pink slip which could make you blue, but the goal for them would be to operate in the black. Yeah, like that's not confusing.
So ... what color are you?
The Problem Thinker
To my readers: I didn't write this. If I knew who did, I'd give them credit. I just thought it was humorous enough to pass on. Be sure to read all the way to the end.
It started out innocently enough.. I began to think at parties now and then -- just to loosen up.
Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.
I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.
That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.
I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't help myself.
I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau, Muir, Confucius and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"
One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."
I came home early that afternoon. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking... ."
"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!"
But, Honey, surely it's not that serious."
"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver.
"You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won't have any money!"
"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently.
She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.
"I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.
I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors.
They didn't open. The library was closed.
To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. Leaning on the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye, "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked.
You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinkers Anonymous poster.
This is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.
I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting..
I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.
Today I took the final step.
I joined the Democratic Party.
It started out innocently enough.. I began to think at parties now and then -- just to loosen up.
Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.
I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.
That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.
I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't help myself.
I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau, Muir, Confucius and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"
One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."
I came home early that afternoon. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking... ."
"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!"
But, Honey, surely it's not that serious."
"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver.
"You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won't have any money!"
"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently.
She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.
"I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.
I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors.
They didn't open. The library was closed.
To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. Leaning on the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye, "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked.
You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinkers Anonymous poster.
This is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.
I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting..
I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.
Today I took the final step.
I joined the Democratic Party.
Humor for Lexophiles
A friend sent this to me and it was worth it to pass it on to you. If you don't laugh, at least you'll have new insight into my character.
1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
4. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
5. The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
6. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
7. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
8. The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it!
9. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.
10. The dead batteries were given out, free of charge.
11. A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
12. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is just two-tired.
13. A will is a dead giveaway.
14. A backward poet writes inverse.
15. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
16. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
17. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulting in linoleum blownapart.
18. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
19. A calendar's days are numbered.
20. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
21. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
22. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
23. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
24. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
4. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
5. The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
6. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
7. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
8. The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it!
9. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.
10. The dead batteries were given out, free of charge.
11. A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
12. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is just two-tired.
13. A will is a dead giveaway.
14. A backward poet writes inverse.
15. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
16. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
17. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulting in linoleum blownapart.
18. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
19. A calendar's days are numbered.
20. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
21. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
22. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
23. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
24. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
NSF
This is not original. A friend of mine has a friend in the banking profession sent me this that was sent to him. I thought it was funny enough to pass on.
Dear Sirs,
I recently received a notice on one of my checks that said "insufficient funds." In view of what is going on internationally with banks at the moment, I was wondering if you could advise me. Does that refer to me or to you?
Sincerely,
A depositor
Dear Sirs,
I recently received a notice on one of my checks that said "insufficient funds." In view of what is going on internationally with banks at the moment, I was wondering if you could advise me. Does that refer to me or to you?
Sincerely,
A depositor
Know-It-Some
I've been accused of being an arrogant know-it-all. While I'm not sure actually knowing it all is a bad thing, I'm pretty sure that being an arrogant know-it-all isn't meant as a compliment. Of course, to be fair, I don't know where the accusation comes from. You see, there are a lot of things I don't understand.
I don't understand the correlation of predestination and free will. I affirm both and perhaps a lot more of it seems clear to me than to a lot of others I know, but I can't really put it all together in a nice, neat package.
I don't understand Quantum Physics. Not even a little.
I don't understand the Trinity. Oh, I believe it and I can explain a lot about it, but ... it's God and I'm not.
The other day I was waiting with other pedestrians at a street corner waiting for the light to change. A woman waiting with us became very agitated. A motorist across the way had part of his car in the crosswalk while he waited behind the bus that had stopped in front of him. She started to yell at him. "Don't you know that it's illegal to stop your car in the crosswalk??!! What's wrong with you??!!" And then she crossed ... against the light. I don't understand people like that.
Some of what I don't get isn't nearly as serious. I work in a "weapons-free zone". So why can't I get free weapons?
I bought a bottle of water from a vending machine and followed the instructions, "Get change here." So why am I still the same?
Why are some people lack toast and tolerant?
What exactly is a pullet surprise and why are people happy to get them?
Oh, the list goes on and on. I'd have to say that I'm not much more than a know-it-some. I think the better people get to know me, the more likely they'll think I'm a know-very-little.
I don't understand the correlation of predestination and free will. I affirm both and perhaps a lot more of it seems clear to me than to a lot of others I know, but I can't really put it all together in a nice, neat package.
I don't understand Quantum Physics. Not even a little.
I don't understand the Trinity. Oh, I believe it and I can explain a lot about it, but ... it's God and I'm not.
The other day I was waiting with other pedestrians at a street corner waiting for the light to change. A woman waiting with us became very agitated. A motorist across the way had part of his car in the crosswalk while he waited behind the bus that had stopped in front of him. She started to yell at him. "Don't you know that it's illegal to stop your car in the crosswalk??!! What's wrong with you??!!" And then she crossed ... against the light. I don't understand people like that.
Some of what I don't get isn't nearly as serious. I work in a "weapons-free zone". So why can't I get free weapons?
I bought a bottle of water from a vending machine and followed the instructions, "Get change here." So why am I still the same?
Why are some people lack toast and tolerant?
What exactly is a pullet surprise and why are people happy to get them?
Oh, the list goes on and on. I'd have to say that I'm not much more than a know-it-some. I think the better people get to know me, the more likely they'll think I'm a know-very-little.
Ah, What then?
While I am reading my book, Sophie's World, I read a paragraph that makes my day. It is like the one who gave that gift (Janus), is asking me about the line you are about to read:
"What if you slept? And what if, in your sleep, you dreamed? And what if, in your dream, you went to the heaven and there plucked a strange and beautiful flower? And what if, when you awoke, you had a flower in your hand?
Ah, what then?"
What then?
Something random to share today :)
"What if you slept? And what if, in your sleep, you dreamed? And what if, in your dream, you went to the heaven and there plucked a strange and beautiful flower? And what if, when you awoke, you had a flower in your hand?
Ah, what then?"
What then?
Something random to share today :)
Banned Bunny
Did you know that there are "banned" Bugs Bunny cartoons? That's right. There are, according to sources, twelve cartoons featuring Bugs Bunny that have been removed from circulation by the owners because they contained what was deemed to be racist or offensive content. Imagine that! Bugs Bunny cartoons -- racist and offensive.
Well, tell me "banned Bugs Bunny cartoons" and I go searching. I haven't found them all. They're not available. But I've seen a few. I watch them and think, "Oh, yeah, I can see how that would be offensive ... today." You see, when I watched them as a kid, I didn't see it. It's not that I was so racist as a child that it didn't phase me. It's that I didn't have a single racist thought as a kid so the notion that Bugs Bunny might be insulting certain people groups never occurred to me. And, now that I think about it, I still have to wonder.
A few of them include caricatures of various races like Native American, black, and Eskimo. As in just about every single Bugs Bunny cartoon that I can think of, Bugs is smart while his antagonist is stupid. Whether it's Pete Puma, Elmer Fudd, or any other character who crosses Bugs' path, they are portrayed as dim-witted and Bugs as brilliant. Funny thing. when Pete Puma or Elmer Fudd or a pack of hounds are portrayed as dim-witted, no one is up in arms. The animal rights folks aren't protesting. There isn't a cacaphony of white organizations trying to ban a racist depiction of white folks in the character of Elmer. But change that character to someone of another race and we've got a problem.
A couple of them include caricatures of the Germans and the Japanese. That, of course, is because they were made during World War II. Anytime we go to war, it is likely that we will make fun of the enemy. Spoofs of Sadaam were popular during Desert Storm. The Internet is full of lampoons of Osama Bin Laden. So in World War II, the Germans and the Japanese were stereotyped and made to look stupid. This, of course, is unacceptable. When satirizing someone, you must always treat them with dignity and decorum. You know, like all the comedy outlets do today when ridiculing the President or Christians or ... wait, that's not working, is it?
I'm not saying that there was no racism in those old cartoons. Nor am I condoning them. I'm simply saying that there's something to be said for childhood innocence. As a kid it never occurred to me that those comedic images were actually intended as racist commentaries. I thought they were cartoons. Foolishly, I thought they were fictional, intended to make Bugs look smart and funny and make me laugh. Little did I know that they were the product of a deep and abiding hatred for anything "other". I didn't suspect that Elmer Fudd represented a stupid white American, that Pete Puma was the cartoon's way of telling us how all pumas are idiots, or that Japanese people are idiots because they portrayed one that way. So maybe children miss this stuff.
I suspect, however, that in some cases children are simply more accurate in these things. It seems as if any comment, any innuendo, any wink-wink-nudge-nudge, anything that even hints at the mere possibility of a whiff of racism is perceived as an affront. In a recent news item about how white people are becoming the minority in many places, I heard the commentator mention how Hispanics perceive "illegal alien" as racist. Now, if you examine the term, there is nothing "racist" in the term. Illegal aliens come from any country that is not this country. They are any race, any color, any creed. It is non-discriminatory except for the concept of "illegal". Yet the perception is that the term is racist. Why? And why is it that only white people can be racist? Why is it that no one is complaining on the behalf of Elmer Fudd? He's white and stupid. Why aren't they up in arms over that?
I don't know. I like to think that adults acquire wisdom over the years, and I believe that is generally true. Sometimes, however, the innocence of children will provide a component of wisdom that many seem to have lost. Can't we all just get along?
Well, tell me "banned Bugs Bunny cartoons" and I go searching. I haven't found them all. They're not available. But I've seen a few. I watch them and think, "Oh, yeah, I can see how that would be offensive ... today." You see, when I watched them as a kid, I didn't see it. It's not that I was so racist as a child that it didn't phase me. It's that I didn't have a single racist thought as a kid so the notion that Bugs Bunny might be insulting certain people groups never occurred to me. And, now that I think about it, I still have to wonder.
A few of them include caricatures of various races like Native American, black, and Eskimo. As in just about every single Bugs Bunny cartoon that I can think of, Bugs is smart while his antagonist is stupid. Whether it's Pete Puma, Elmer Fudd, or any other character who crosses Bugs' path, they are portrayed as dim-witted and Bugs as brilliant. Funny thing. when Pete Puma or Elmer Fudd or a pack of hounds are portrayed as dim-witted, no one is up in arms. The animal rights folks aren't protesting. There isn't a cacaphony of white organizations trying to ban a racist depiction of white folks in the character of Elmer. But change that character to someone of another race and we've got a problem.
A couple of them include caricatures of the Germans and the Japanese. That, of course, is because they were made during World War II. Anytime we go to war, it is likely that we will make fun of the enemy. Spoofs of Sadaam were popular during Desert Storm. The Internet is full of lampoons of Osama Bin Laden. So in World War II, the Germans and the Japanese were stereotyped and made to look stupid. This, of course, is unacceptable. When satirizing someone, you must always treat them with dignity and decorum. You know, like all the comedy outlets do today when ridiculing the President or Christians or ... wait, that's not working, is it?
I'm not saying that there was no racism in those old cartoons. Nor am I condoning them. I'm simply saying that there's something to be said for childhood innocence. As a kid it never occurred to me that those comedic images were actually intended as racist commentaries. I thought they were cartoons. Foolishly, I thought they were fictional, intended to make Bugs look smart and funny and make me laugh. Little did I know that they were the product of a deep and abiding hatred for anything "other". I didn't suspect that Elmer Fudd represented a stupid white American, that Pete Puma was the cartoon's way of telling us how all pumas are idiots, or that Japanese people are idiots because they portrayed one that way. So maybe children miss this stuff.
I suspect, however, that in some cases children are simply more accurate in these things. It seems as if any comment, any innuendo, any wink-wink-nudge-nudge, anything that even hints at the mere possibility of a whiff of racism is perceived as an affront. In a recent news item about how white people are becoming the minority in many places, I heard the commentator mention how Hispanics perceive "illegal alien" as racist. Now, if you examine the term, there is nothing "racist" in the term. Illegal aliens come from any country that is not this country. They are any race, any color, any creed. It is non-discriminatory except for the concept of "illegal". Yet the perception is that the term is racist. Why? And why is it that only white people can be racist? Why is it that no one is complaining on the behalf of Elmer Fudd? He's white and stupid. Why aren't they up in arms over that?
I don't know. I like to think that adults acquire wisdom over the years, and I believe that is generally true. Sometimes, however, the innocence of children will provide a component of wisdom that many seem to have lost. Can't we all just get along?
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